


so if you feel like i feel

by godblesscicero



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, First Kiss, Mutual Pining, and we were both girls ... Haha jk..., and we were both pining for each other ...., awkward teenagers, post S1E16 Enchanting Grom Fright, unless, what if we plotted a romantic wlw story together....
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:21:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25861240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godblesscicero/pseuds/godblesscicero
Summary: Luz gets up from the sofa – they’re in Amity’s library hideout, and the soft lights do nothing to numb Luz’s desire for scheming and plotting. As Amity looks up at her, she sticks another piece of paper on the board they’ve set up to brainstorm. “The best books have many layers, just like the best lasagna. We could be writing history, here.” The piece of paper has, very sagely, ‘lasagna’ written on it.“We’re writing fanfiction.”“And your point is?”-Or, Luz unwittingly embarks on a journey of self discovery, Amity gets teased (again) and romantic literature tropes are discussed.
Relationships: Amity Blight/Luz Noceda
Comments: 87
Kudos: 1297





	so if you feel like i feel

**Author's Note:**

> hi!! even though this story is actually a follow-up to [dancing cheek to cheek](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25803367), you can kinda read it on its own, too. though if you're here for the pining i think you'd also enjoy that one. k bye!!
> 
> edit: idk if people are still reading this BUT the wonderful twitter user @richy_nepp made a [SUPER CUTE AND AMAZING fanart](https://twitter.com/richy_nepp/status/1300314617839722497) about a scene of the story so please please please go and give her lots of love!!

“Sweet extra credit, here I come!”

Luz can’t stop herself from jumping in the air, a few feet before her friend. An unusual, sweet smile is painted on Amity’s face as they walk towards the library together.

It’s the first time that Luz’s allowed back into the building since the whole Wailing Star mess – the head librarian still hasn’t completely forgiven her, but luckily Amity seems to be everyone’s favourite pupil. So, with a good word from her, they managed to lift the ban.

_It’s just to thank you for Grom_ , Amity had told her, trying feebly to extricate herself from her crushing hug, _don’t get too used to it_. Willow had stared at them strangely.

“I figured you’d be the one person capable of being excited about reading children’s books.”

Luz stops in her tracks, for so long that Amity has to pause her walking, too, and look at her. Her friend’s easy smile morphs into something that resembles worry.

“You mean you’re not excited?” For reasons that go beyond her comprehension, Amity’s eyes widen, and she’s quick to correct herself.

“I am! It’s just, you know, I’ve done it so many times before.”

A big smile blossoms on Luz’s lips, and she walks slash jumps forward to take her friend’s hand.

“Yeah! But you’ve never done it with someone else. And that’s different, we can do voices! Oh, I know you’ve mastered your ‘I’m dangerous and rude and I don’t want any friends’ voice _and_ persona, but will you let me do some of the villains?”

Amity lifts one single eyebrow. _How does she do that? Is it genetics? Should I try to do that? But it’s so high. How does she do that?_

“Luz… Most children’s books don’t really have villains.” Some people might think that it’d be annoying, being friends with someone that always tries to put you down.

“Oh but they should! Think about the drama!”

Amity laughs like Christmas bells. If you manage to notice how her eyes twinkle as they talk, it becomes clear that she’s not being difficult for the sake of being difficult, but because she loves to banter.

Luz does, too: she launches herself in a passionate speech about the ethics and morality in developing toddlers, but she doesn’t really notice how Amity’s a bit distracted. She bites the inside of her cheek, presses together her smiling lips, and looks at everywhere on Luz’s face beside her eyes.

*

“‘...besides, there is nothing bad with having a little fun sometimes,’ said Grophius, in his squeaky little voice. Anvilia, sighed as she watched the sun disappear behind the hills.”

“‘I guess you are right, my friend. Just a little, though.’”

“Aaand that marks the end!” Luz closes the book with a clap, clearly happy about the outcome of the story. The children, on the other hand, seem to be very upset.

“I want more!”  
“Yes, read us the next one!”

The unusual, bright red child (which also happens to be Luz’s favourite, though she’d never admit she’s playing favorites) with the even more unusual voice speaks up, too, disgruntled, but she doesn’t quite understand the words. _Dang, and here I thought I was getting better at it_ , she muses.

“Come on, children,” Amity interjects before Luz can pick up another book and start over again, like she did last week, to the dismay of the parents who couldn’t get their children back. “Time’s almost up, your parents will be here soon.” A sad chorus lifts from the group and the girl is quick to correct herself. “But remember that next week, same time, we’ll be here again!”

That seems to be a good enough patch, for now. Luz watches Amity take the book and put it away with the others, zoning out for a sec. The children’s laughing and general screaming doesn’t really come to her ears as she observes Amity saying goodbye to every one of them.

Only after everybody has left, and silence has come, Amity turns to glance at her: Luz notices that Amity notices that she was staring, and she jumps on her seat. Amity’s cheeks glow just slightly pinker than a second before.

“So!” Luz rises out of her seat, brushing off the heat she feels on her own cheeks. “That was cool!”

“I- Well, yes, by children’s books standards, Anvilia is quite good.” Amity busies herself with her bag, apparently doing something that Luz can’t see.

“To be honest I can’t wait to read the next one. I’m almost tempted to do that _now_. Aren’t you curious about what the next adventure could be?”

“Oh, Luz…” Amity looks pained when she lifts her head. “I forgot you didn’t grow up with these books, so you couldn’t know it, but… This was the last one.” Something in Luz’s chest shatters.

“What?!”

Amity gets close to her, places a kind hand on her shoulder. It’s a comfort, a small one, but it’s something. Still, Luz throws herself on the soft playground.

“But how could they do that! And what about Magna Mallea! There was clearly some romantic tension between her and Anvilia! I’ve been waiting for six volumes… And the Funny-Business Kingdom, we’re just supposed to be okay with the way the last book ended? I thought we’d get all the drama of an arranged marriage between the Architect and Anvilia…”

Amity snorts. Luz lifts her head, looking at her with tearful eyes.

“An arranged marriage in a children’s book?”

“Did you just _snort_?”

“I- I didn’t!” _Since when has she been stammering so much?_ “Anyway, this was the eighteenth book of the whole saga, don’t you think it’s enough?” Amity slips from her chair to sit down next to her desperate friend.

“Well the world has been existing for four billion years and I don’t see people saying that’s enough!”

“Hmm, but maybe it is.” The witch looks pensive, with a finger on her lips. “It is enough. Let’s put an end to it.”

“Amity, please.”

It’s not a light question, Luz thinks. She sits up, on her legs, and takes both of Amity’s hands in hers. Not many people would notice, but she has a callus on the middle finger of her writing hand – a testament of how much she studies and writes her days away. Luz’s thoughts are often everywhere at once, but she can feel distinctly that a minuscule part of them is strongly focusing on how much she’s come to know, and care, about this girl.

“I wouldn’t ask this to anyone else,” Amity visibly falters, a blush spreading on her ears. “But we’ve got to find the author. And ask them to write the final book. Arranged marriage, pining and all.”

“Luz…” her eyes are so hopeful, a reflection of Luz’s own, and for a second everything looks brighter. But then she deflates. “I’m so sorry, but the author isn’t… alive anymore. The book we read today was actually posthumous.”

“WHAT!” Luz groans loudly, forcing her friend’s hands open to smack her own face with them, in a position that’s just slightly awkward. “Amity, you’ve got no humanity, when did you become such a bearer of bad news?”

The other girl huffs through her nose, and it’s something that reminds her of a laugh. Somehow the sound is enough to lift her spirits, enough to give her another idea that could work – for them but also for the children, yes, Luz’s doing it for the children, mostly. She inhales theatrically.

“Then, the path that is laid before us is clear.” Luz gets on her feet, hopeful again, and extends her hand. Amity doesn’t even look at it before shyly taking it.

“Amity Blight, Grom Queen, Hexside top student, _the_ bestest promise for young witches all over the Boiling Isles and, most importantly, my dearest partner in crime.” Amity’s brow kits more and more as Luz speaks, but it’s not like she can stop now. “Would you bestow upon me the greatest honor… and write the final installment of _Anvilia, the No-Funny-Business Knight_ , with me?”

Her friend, to put it mildly, looks like she’s malfunctioning. She opens and closes her mouth a few times, and Luz waits patiently for a few long seconds. Maybe she’s just thinking about whether she has that much free time or not. But the seconds pass and Amity doesn’t restart.

“Amity? Is something wrong?” The girl jumps on her feet, holding onto Luz’s hand as if her life depends on it.

“Y-yes! No! I mean, I’ve never written a book before, but… It sounds like fun!”

The only thing that Luz can do is pull her friend in a crushing hug, lifting her off the ground by a couple of inches. Amity wheezes, supposedly from being squeezed so hard, and lets out a dying breath.

“Heck yeah! Unrequited mutual pining, here we come!”

*

Plotting is always the funniest part, but Luz never knew how much funnier it could be, to plot together with a friend. Amity’s laughter is definitely more recurring than anyone would think, and Luz can’t stop cracking jokes, one after one other, just to hear it again and again.

“I think we’re getting too dark for a book that’s supposed to be for children.” Something unknown but definitely absurd blooms in Luz’s chest as she watches her friend dry tears from her eyes – tears of laughter! Who knew that Amity Blight could cry, much less happy tears?

“Oh Amity, what an inanity.” Her friend rolls her eyes, slowly becoming accustomed to the fact that Luz enjoys making up idiotic rhymes with her name.

Luz gets up from the sofa – they’re in Amity’s library hideout, and the soft lights do nothing to numb Luz’s desire for scheming and plotting. As Amity looks up at her, she sticks another piece of paper on the board they’ve set up to brainstorm. “The best books have many layers, just like the best lasagna. We could be writing history, here.” The piece of paper has, very sagely, ‘lasagna’ written on it.

“We’re writing _fanfiction_.”

“And your point is?”

“My point,” Amity gets up too, hitting one of the pieces of paper with her knuckle, “is that maybe the third subplot that’s exclusively about politics between the members of the Two Hundred Cities Alliance is _a bit_ too much.”

“Aw, shucks.” Luz brings one hand under her chin, deep in thought. “But doesn’t it bother you when politics are scratched in this kind of stories? You can’t just ignore the fact that we’re in a much much bigger context than just what touches our protagonists.”

“Yeah, but these kids have a frontal lobe that’s as big as a plum. It’s not like they’ll notice.”

That makes Luz snort.

“Amity that’s _so_ mean!”

“What, you think _yours_ is that much bigger?” Amity’s face is a challenge by itself – one eyebrow raised, a smirk on her lips, she crosses her arms, staring right into Luz’s eyes. The few inches she’s got on her add to her (supposedly) threatening demeanor. But Luz’s not one to back from a challenge.

“You looking for trouble, Blight?”

Luz steps even closer, right in her friend’s face, and tilts her head to embrace the fact that she’s shorter, trying to take advantage of it. She doesn’t blink, sniffing and scrunching quickly her nose in what, Luz hopes, looks like a provocation. When Amity speaks, it’s low.

“You begging for it, Noceda?”

For a few seconds, they just stare at each other: Luz can’t remember the last time she found herself in complete silence, and it looks like neither of them is even breathing. Not a sound comes from the library outside, of course, and Luz feels like they’re in a bubble of their own – Amity’s amber eyes are much darker in the low lights of the hideout, and Luz is reminded of Grom night, how happy they’d been back then. For some absurd reason, her heart gives out.

They can’t keep the act up much longer – Amity breaks first, blowing out a whistling laughter, and Luz thinks that she ought to pay a visit to the doctor, because her chest suddenly feels like it’s being pressed into a little package, ready to be sent to the farthest corner of the universe, never to be seen again.

When Luz stops laughing she realizes that she didn’t even notice she was doing it. Amity is drying her tears again, hiccupping a little. Silently, she freaks out about the fact that she’d really like to hear her laugh again, and again, and again.

*

So, she might have a crush on Amity. That’s fine, that’s okay, probably everyone at school has had a little crush on Amity at a certain point in their lives, because honestly who could not?

Briefly she wonders if the person that Amity wanted to go to Grom with feels the same about her. She shoos that thought away like she would do with an annoying mosquito.

So she has a little crush on Amity. Who likes her as well, at least, platonically. Because she does, right? They enjoy doing things together! The Azura Book Club! The reading to children, the writing for children! The fighting indescribable monsters side by side! The terrifying disclosing of painful past memories of her and her oldest friend! Yes, it’s all good fun.

All in all, it would’ve been much worse if this crush had surfaced while they weren’t friends yet. Or maybe it would’ve been better, actually, because she didn’t have to be near Amity at the time, since the girl was so closed off. She really thought Amity hated her, at the beginning. Now the thought is so distant and alien she can’t even remember coming up with it.

_Oh_. A thought smacks Luz’s head, hard. Such a perfect enemies to friends to lovers trope example. With pining on the side!

_That’s so meta_ , Luz muses, and wishes she could become goo and disappear in the crevices between the planks of the floor.

*

Even the library must be closed, sometimes. Usually they go to the Owl House, but there’s never a dull moment there, so it’s quite difficult to concentrate.

They’ve passed the first week mark: the children are impatient, and the excuse ‘we’ve placed an order for the book but it’s not yet here’ can’t hold for yet another week. A bit of pressure can be useful, in these situations – they’ll have to be a little quicker, is all, but Luz has always worked better under a deadline.

No distractions. No looking too much at Amity’s room, asking about this or that thing that lays scattered on the floor, no theatrics, or bantering, or holding hands for no reason, whatever situation could potentially put Luz in a position where she would hit blue screen and completely shut down.

None of that. With that prospect in mind, Luz feels both determinate and also a bit miserable.

The walk to the Blight Manor isn’t short, but it’s nice. Amity listens very closely while Luz explains some details she thinks would work better in some other way, some sort of trick to cut more than a dozen pages, not yet written. Neither of them are quite that good at writing fight scenes, so they try to avoid them as much as they can. As the gardens of Amity’s house get closer, Luz wraps her speech up.

“Okay, so, Em and Ed are here, too.” Amity looks more unsettled than one would think. “Just- don’t talk to them, don’t answer to their questions, better yet, don’t look at them _at all_.”

Luz still doesn’t understand how deeply her friend’s distaste towards her siblings runs and vice versa: even as an only child, she knows it’s normal for brothers and sisters to argue, but sometimes Amity seems truly unsettled by Em and Ed’s behavior.

“Okay, but… I know them, that would be _really_ rude-”

Her friend doesn’t bother to argue. The door is open, they step inside, and a screech comes from one of the rooms, even though Luz couldn’t say if it’s from Edric or Emira. Probably Edric.

Two heads pop out from the same room.

“Oh hi Luz!”

“Wassup, Lucy!” Human lingo is more and more used at school these days, and for some reason she’s proud that Amity’s brother is one of the people that’s spreading it the most. “We’re so glad you’re here!”

“Certainly not as glad as Mittens, though,” there must be a gene for lifting your eyebrow, because Emira does so in the exact same way Amity does.

“Oh, oh! Maybe we should move the _s_ and call you Smitten instead!”

Emira makes a face.

“That was _really_ unfunny, but I agree with the sentiment.”  
“Thanks, I try.”

Luz is still smiling as the twins banter, but she turns her head to look at Amity, waiting for her to pitch in so she can understand or take part in the joke, too. Instead, the girl’s face is steering towards the same shade of the beautiful, delicate pink roses Willow tends to in her classes.

“Anyway, Luz, you remember Grom n-”  
“Yeah, no, we’re not doing this. Bye.” Amity turns on her heels, marching towards the stairs.

“Aw, that’s too bad.” Edric snickers, but Emira doesn’t get discouraged as easily as her twin does. As the two girls climb the first step, she speaks loudly.

“You’re going to your room then? Remember to keep the door at least two inches-”

Amity runs back in a flash, leaving Luz there, and this time she’s clearly strawberry red. She comes to a stop in front of her siblings, and speaks quietly. Luz can still make out the words, but they’re a bit tuned out since she’s thinking about what Emira said and realizing the implications of them and suddenly her face grows hot, too.

The reason behind Amity’s hostility towards her siblings feels a little clearer now – to tease your sister about _romance_ when she’s struggling with a (maybe) unrequited crush she can barely talk about, well. Luz thought that her cousins back home were pests towards each other. But this is overly despicable.

“Be reminded that I can, and given the occasion I will, kill you.”  
“ _Oooooh_.”  
“ _Uuuuuuuuh_.”  
“Oh so Death Magic is why you’ve been cooped up in your room all the time these days! And here we were, thinking you were writing poetr-”

Luz politely looks the other way as Amity slams the door on her siblings’ faces, quietly hoping they were quick enough to jump back and save their noses.

As they enter Amity’s bedroom, Luz is too distracted by how tidy _and_ color-coordinated everything is, and she doesn’t hear the indignant gasp that comes from Emira, out there on the stairs, as her sister sticks out her tongue at her and completely closes the door.

*

“So… I noticed you and Amity have been hanging out a lot since Grom!” Luz doesn’t know what to make of the tone in Willow’s voice, but she carefully hopes her friend is not that much resentful of Amity – she’d seen them together during Grom, and Willow looked like she was having fun. “What have you been up to?”

So, she guesses that she’s simply curious.

Luz puts down Willow’s scroll on the cafeteria table. Since Luz doesn’t have a one, Willow lets her use her own to check Penstagram and be up-to-date with school gossip.

“Oh yeah! We’ve been working on a silly project for the children’s reading club at the library.”

“No offence, but it’s kind of unsettling to think that Amity finds reading to children fun,” adds Gus, quietly munching on his ‘sandwitch’. Luz laughs.

“I mean, at the beginning I was surprised too,” she shrugs. “But it checks out with how dorky she actually is.”

Gus lifts his head to look at her, a confused expression on his face.

“Huh, _dorky_ is not a word I’d use to describe Amity.”

Luz picks up Willow’s scroll again, resting her arm on the table and her chin on that same arm. “Well, okay, she’s mostly not dorky, but you’ve heard how she snorts when she laughs sometimes- that’s definitely dorky.”

Gus and Willow pause to look at each other, then at her. She doesn’t really notice, mainly because now there’s a picture of Amity in front of her – it’s not a selfie, but a photo that Skara took from afar and then posted. She looks deep in thought, lips pursed, as she plays with her small earring while looking at somewhere without really seeing anything.

_‘anybody else wondering who shes thinking about_ 👀 _’_

“Hhhrrjrlkglgnn…” is the feeble sound that comes from Luz’s lips. Something compels her to get up, run out of the cafeteria in search of her friend, just to place a kiss her stupidly pretty face. There, she said it – or, well, thought it at least.

(“Hum, Luz?”  
“How did she make that sound?”  
“I don’t know, can you do it?”  
“I don’t think so. She’s zoning out, isn’t she?” Gus waves a hand near her face. Willow chuckles.)

There’s a second picture, too, if she swipes right, probably the effect of the camera sound on Amity, since she looks way angrier in this one. Luz can’t help but snicker, entertaining the thought that maybe she was simply thinking about the finale of their book.

They’ve come to an abrupt stop in their almost-finished writing: they can’t agree on whether the heroine should get together with her romantic interest during or after the final battle. Everybody knows that emotionally charged battle scenes are super satisfying, so Luz is pushing for that, but Amity argues that the heroine is too task-driven to get distracted with romance while fighting, and that it would ruin her whole character.

But the children’s reading club is tomorrow. They’ll have to settle it, and write the final chapters, very soon.

“Hey, Luz?” Willow’s voice pulls her out of her rambling thoughts. Luz jumps, putting the scroll down on the table again.

“Oh, sorry! I got distracted!”

Next to her, Gus takes a look at the scroll and snickers. Luz feels heat burning on her cheeks, and picks it back.

“We were saying that Amity doesn’t even laugh that often, so hearing her snort is basically off the table.” _Oh, come on, that’s not true_ , Luz wants to argue, sweating, but her gaze keeps falling on the pictures again and she doesn’t speak immediately. After a few, quick seconds, the need to defend Amity (from _what_ exactly?) wins.

“Aw, come on guys, she’s really not as terrifying as you make her out to be. Her falsetto-princess-voice is the funniest thing ever. Or the way her face gets all red when Emira teases her- not so much when Edric does it, because she can simply punch him, you know, but Emira is scarier for some reason. And again, when she laughs, it’s like- you know the cherubs in those old paintings, the small chubby angels, it’s like those things are coming down from heaven to bless your ears.” Luz’s brow scrunches in serious consideration. “Okay, that was a weird image.”

For some reason Willow raises her eyebrows with a strange expression, one she’s never seen before, something that screams: _duh_. A single drop of sweat runs on her back.

*

Again, okay, she has a crush on Amity and at least _some_ people have caught on. What is she supposed to do about that! Willow and Gus, ever the emphatic friends she’s always wished for, have left her with a couple of pats on her back a few minutes ago, and now she’s alone with her thoughts once again.

Luz dully and slowly bangs the side of her head against the wall, waiting for Amity’s class to finish so they can run to the library and argue some more about appropriate levels of pining and romantic anticipation in children’s literature.

As for the other thing, not _one_ noteworthy solution to her problem comes to her. She sighs, resigning herself to her fate. What’s so hard about having to bear a few more hours sitting close to Amity, cramped up in the same, small room? She’s done that before. Many times.

The thing is that every detail that she’s never bothered to actually notice during those afternoons comes back to her these days – the way Amity huffed while reading the drafts, finding something that didn’t sit right with her, the way she folded the corners of all the pages that contained a particularly nice passage, just to tell Luz so when they reviewed their writings together. The way her brow furrowed, the sound she made by clicking her tongue while she thought about how to efficiently word a sentence, a feeling, a thought.

And then there was the way she carefully took her hand every time Luz handed it out as a joke or just for the sake of theatrics: Amity always held onto it, and a thrill would run through Luz. Even though in the first few days she didn’t realize the reason behind that feeling.

Luz lifts her head, banging it again against the wall, and groans.

She wants to hold her hand again, so bad. And Grom, too, she wants to go through that whole night again just to relive the moments when they danced, and to bask in the gaze that Amity kept looking at her with for some reason that Luz can’t quite grasp.

Again, the frustrating thought of who Amity wanted to ask out comes to her mind. _It’s not your business, champ_ , she tells herself, preparing for the next hit against the wall.

“You ready to get your butt kicked by efficient narrative tropes and realistic character development?”

The subject of her unending pondering manifests just behind her, making Luz jump on her feet. Amity is smirking with a great deal of confidence, but for a second her expression shifts.

“Also why were you hitting the wall with your head?”

In a swoop of joy and recklessness, Luz takes her hand and turns towards the exit.

“I wasn’t! Now let’s go!”

Her friend stumbles behind, holding onto her hand as she usually does. As they run, Luz’s heart rises into her throat.

*

“And so, after protecting her beloved Magna Mallea from the deathly strike of an enemy spear, Anvilia lifts herself from the ground, rises to her full height on her tip toes… and at the same time, Mallea bows down to kiss her!”

“Uuuuugh.” Amity groans loudly from her place on the ground. She’s resting her head on a balled up blanket. “And then another enemy bonks them both on their heads. The end.”

Luz pouts.

“It’s just not realistic, Luz. They’re in the middle of a fight!”

“Yes, that’s precisely why they would kiss! Everything is at stake here, especially since Anvilia is not invulnerable anymore.”

“And she’s spent the last _eighteen_ books making extremely rational decisions, to the point of _boredom_ because she’s literally the No-Funny-Business knight, with the sole purpose of protecting her friends and loved ones, so _why_ would she slip exactly in the moment that counts the most?”

“Well, because…” Luz sits on the ground next to her friend, shoulders slumped.

“You’ve never made a rash decision in your whole life? That’s just… how loving someone works, for some people.” Luz hopes with her entire heart that Amity can’t somehow perceive how hot her face’s feeling. Amity stays silent, a delicate ribbon of red as a garnish on her cheeks, too.

_Who are you thinking about_ , Luz’s brain supplies unhelpfully as the entirety of her being feels exactly like the sad pensive emoji. Then, she huffs.

“Of course I have.” Some sort of thought Luz’s not privy to runs through her head. “But this is a matter of whether this character would do this or not, and I just… don’t think she would.”

Luz nods, poking at her friend’s arm with her finger.

“Okay, I dutifully accept your criticism. Let’s hear how you’d do it then.” Amity looks at her through her eyelashes for several moments, then she tilts her head.

“Help me get up.”

“What? But I’ve just sat down-” Luz sputters, but Amity cuts through.

“My fearless champions abandons me, in my darkest hour?” Her voice is so airy and ridiculous that Luz has to throw her head back and laugh. “When the direst times came, my one and only light really turned her head not to see the suffering I was going thr-”

“Okay! Okay, I get it.” She slowly gets on her feet, dusting her hands on her pants, even though for some reason there’s never dust in the hideout. Luz offers her hand out to the other girl, who’s quick to catch it. Amity’s skin is, as usual, soft and warm.

As if it was a passing thought just like any other, the crucial (and up until now, surprisingly, forgotten) memory of the kiss she’d placed on her friend’s cheek at the end of Grom passes swiftly through her head, like it’s taking a leisurely stroll, stunning her completely. Her cheek was just as soft as her hands. Luz feels her face catch on fire.

_I did that. Did I really do that? I did. Did I?_

When she comes back to her senses, Amity’s up on her feet, a determined accent in her features.

“Okay, it goes like this.” She takes a deep breath. “Immediately after the battle, as the enemies retreat, the two desperately look for each other, dreading the thought of not finding who they’re looking for.” Luz basks a little in the joy of seeing the way the story engages Amity – she must’ve rubbed off on her, too, because she’s dramatically reenacting her own words. Luz gets ready to perform any supporting roles in her tale.

“And for a split second, across the battlefield, Anvilia sees Magna Mallea!” Luz fakes a gasp, opening her hands on the side of her head to mimic fireworks. Amity chuckles. “But as she starts to run towards her, a soldier comes up to her and tells her that she’s needed for bureaucratic reasons or something.”

“Dang, don’t get my hopes up like that.”

Amity laughs again.

“It’s to bring the suspense just a notch higher. Be patient.” Amity clears her throat, walks on the far side of the room, and turns to show Luz her back. “So they don’t really speak after the battle. But then, after we’ve wrapped the other things up- I don’t know, treaties, politics, whatever your nerd heart desires- Anvilia is out on the outskirts of the palace’s gardens, surveying the finally free territories of her usurped land, with peace in her heart.”

She brings both her hands on her own chest, closing her eyes.

“But there’s still a burning ache there, something unspeakable that threatens to come out at a moment’s notice… Alas, with no one close enough to hear it.” Luz swallows air as Amity pauses.

“She doesn’t know, though, that her dearest and also most unexpected friend is just a few feet behind, contemplating that moment of peace that somehow never seemed to get through Anvilia before: Magna Mallea is there, unnoticed.”

It’s ridiculous, Luz muses, how fast her heart is beating. And for a children’s tale, at that. Luz knows she’s even more ridiculous, pretending that the reason why she’s feeling this way is the story and not the way her friend speaks, so softly and carefully, like those are her own thoughts, so delicately and lovingly raised from the smallest seeds into these warm words.

Luz can’t help but being drawn in, and she takes a few careful steps towards the other girl. Amity’s speaking again, and Luz is just behind her as she turns for the big reveal.

“And she’s barely a foot behind her, in the fateful moment when Anvilia whispers-”

Something seems to lock into Amity’s throat at the sight of her friend so close to her, and her words are abruptly cut. Her eyebrows are knitted closely, lips pursed together. Luz is hanging on her next words, but they both float inside the strange silence for a few beats. They’re so close, Luz realizes, so close that she can count her eyelashes, and the thought is cheesy.

“Well? What does she says?”

Amity lets out a whimper, closing her eyes, with her hands still resting on her own chest like she’s scared, and Luz notices that she’s trembling. Worry knits her brow, just as Amity’s lips move to speak.

“I… like you?”

Luz makes a face, clicking her tongue. “ _I like you_ , after nineteen books?” She throws her hands up in the air. “I mean, come o- _wait_.”

Realization strikes, and her eyes bulge.

“Wait what?!” Hearing her high pitched voice, Amity whimpers again, bowing her head, shifting her hands from her chest to her face, covering her eyes.

“Amity?!”

Luz doesn’t think that Amity can actually hear her: if her heart is beating as fast as hers is, then she can’t possibly hear a word coming from the outside world. As a million questions run through her head, Luz stops breathing for so long that when she comes to her senses it’s simply because of her need of air.

She focuses her gaze forward, expecting it to be an elaborate daydream of hers – but Amity is still there, seemingly smaller and smaller as the moments pass. She doesn’t seem to have moved much, and Luz’s heart breaks a bit as she realizes that maybe she’s just waiting for Luz to leave.

Fearfully, like in front of here there’s a scared cat instead of her friend, she manages to lift her hands, placing them lightly on the other’s arms.

Amity startles, tensing up. Luz’s panic stops from unfurling like she’s pressed the pause button on it.

For the first time during this whole thing, she feels intensely, aggressively, a need to comfort and reassure that’s stronger than any other feeling of disbelief or relief or hope or warmth that are wracking her chest now. After a long exhale, she speaks softly.

“Come on, Amity.” Very slowly, she reaches up to take the other girl’s hands in hers, to peel them off of her eyes. “Don’t you wanna hear what the answer is?”

“Not really,” the other girl grits out with a crack in her voice, still refusing to open her eyes, which is something that Luz doesn’t exactly hate – she’s not sure she’d be able to say it, under the other girl’s gaze.

Luz turns Amity’s hands in hers, a gesture that has become so natural for them, but the setting is so unusual that Luz can’t bear it: instead, she does something that’s slightly newer, pulling Amity towards her, encircling her with trembling arms and bringing her face next to one of her weird, wonderful, pointy ears, as close as possible, so she won’t have to speak the words out loud. Amity gasps, her hands crushing against her back, clinging to her clothes.

Luz opens and closes her mouth a few times, unable to get anything out. Seconds pass.

At last, she groans.

“God, how did you find the courage to do this?”

Amity pushes at her, gasping, indignant.

“Luz!”

“What! I’m nervous! I’m literally two seconds away from fainting!” Amity’s hold tightens for a second, then she breaks the hug, crossing her arms and looking at her with actual tears in her eyes, but there’s a smile on her lips that she’s clearly trying to stifle, so she’s not _actually_ scary.

Luz wonders how quickly she’ll manage to get that laughter to spill over, as she always does, but unexpectedly her mind runs somewhere else, too.

She brings one hand under her own chin, in thought.

“Wait, all this time, the person you wanted to go to Grom with was-”

Amity yelps, surges forward, knocks her hand away and kisses her: briefly, clearly a way to shut her up. Luz doesn’t find it in herself to mind.

*

“‘… Anvilia casted a final glance on the endless hills that laid before her, lulled by the comfort that holding her loved one gave her. For many, many moments, as long as years, all was well.’” Luz exhales through her nose, as a wonderful feeling of peace courses through her. “The end!”

The binder closes without a clapping sound, this time, because they didn’t have the time to print the pages again and bind them to make an actual book. It’s not a real loss – the sound wouldn’t have been audible anyway, over the children’s screaming voices.

The reading session today has run a little late. By the time they were supposed to wrap everything up, only ten pages or so were left, so the parents sat down with their children and half listened to the final moments of the story, somehow curious about the origin of the so desperately infamous (and also suddenly available) nineteenth _Anvilia_ book.

“That went well,” Amity is smiling as she speaks, a kindness in her eyes that isn’t really different than the one she displayed just the week before.

Only Luz knows, somehow in a restless way, that now there’s something else behind that gaze. She shows her biggest, and also probably stupidest, smile, carefully putting the binder away.

“Actually, while I was reading out loud I noticed some things that sounded weird,” she muses. “We could rush to the hideout and fix them before the library closes for the night.” Amity hums as an answer, and there’s a small pause.

“I agree with the hideout part.” A timid glance. “But we could do something else instead.”

A ridiculous chortle makes Luz choke on her own spit, and she’s still coughing as one of the kids approaches them with a question.

“Hi, Janus.” Amity’s lips curve into a loving smile as Luz tries not to die next to her. Between the coughs, she recognizes Janus as one of the oldest and smartest kids in the bunch. He’s basically bouncing on the spot excitedly.

“Hi Amity! Hi Luz! The book was so cool today! But… what about the Two Hundred Cities Alliance? They never appeared again in the story!”

Even with her face slightly purple because of the exertion, Luz can’t hold herself back, and the ‘HAH! Told you so!’ that she gets to rub in Amity’s face is the most smug sounds she makes in many, many months. Amity can’t help but laugh quietly, too, as she sends the kid away with a resigned shrug.

Not much later, as they’re walking towards the romance section, Luz reaches for Amity’s hand.

They keep squeezing back and forth until they break into a silent chuckle, and Luz pretends she’s not flattered by the way Amity’s cheeks get immediately pink. She discovers wonderful, strawberry red, too, when in the soft lights of the room Luz reaches out to fix her hair behind her pointy ears.

Cozily laying on the sofa, legs intertwined, she holds Amity’s hands as close as she can.

**Author's Note:**

> i Cannot wait for wing it like witches to kick me in the face and in the meantime I had to put my lumity/toh feelings somewhere, anyway this has not been betaed(? is that even a word) yet but I hope it will be soon! bear with me, sorry!!
> 
> The title comes from can’t take my eyes off of you (I love gloria gaynor’s version), which, again, is overall a fitting song for these two. Thank you for reading if you’ve gotten here!!!
> 
> (also if ur on twitter im @bee_thecowboy, i don't really post much but i'd be glad to follow other toh accounts!!)


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